Cruise Ship Begs Passengers To Stop Having Sex With Pizza

Holy shit do cruise ships suck. I personally have been on like 3 cruises (Humble brag) The first one was awesome because I was in the 8th grade, I got super duper drunk and I also got to miss a week of school. Only bad part was Jamaica, Where I got stung by a Jelly Fish and my mom had to pee on the infection so I wouldn’t die. The other 2 cruises were kinda shit, Mainly because I bought shit weed at one port and got incredibly sick when I got home.

Cruise Ship

But this shit that some Cruise company called Norwegian ( sounds like a made up country if you ask me) is ridiculous, Isn’t the whole point of going on Cruises is to be able to have crazy sex that would be frowned upon on land? That’s what I thought at least. What a bunch of party poopers, It’s not like this is a Disney Cruise or something.

P.S. I was kidding about Norwegian. I know its in Canada, I’m not that stupid. Take a joke people. I’m new to blogging.

@BMS_Derek

Get You A Friend That Threatens People

Daily Mail- A road manager for the New York City native, 25, was taken into custody at LAX airport on Tuesday in connection with misdemeanor criminal threats in the wake of a skirmish that took place when his American Airlines flight landed in Los Angeles, TMZ reported.

The rap artist, who was inked last year to Interscope Records, was headed to the restroom on an American Airlines that had just landed, but hadn’t yet approached the gate. Flight attendants warned the Rich the Kid, whose real name is Dimitri Leslie Roger, to get back in his seat, but he declined, the outlet reported.

At that point, his road manager intervened on Rich’s behalf, and bickered with the plane staff, at one point telling them, ‘I will cut your head off.’

Boy-That-Escalated-Quickly-Anchorman

I don’t condone violence against innocent people by any means but I love this Road Manager who is definitely just this Rappers buddy standing up for his guy even though they are both 100% in the wrong. Who cares, You can’t just sit back while some flight attendant is making your guy look like an asshole to the entire plane.

My friends wouldn’t have said a damn word, In fact they probably would have joined in with the flight attendant and then testified against me. Moral of the story: Rappers have way better friends than I do.

 

 

 

 

Cole Beasley Has Bars And Jerry Jones Should Cut Him

Cole Beasley released his long anticipated hip hop track “80 Stings” a few days ago. I had completely forgot he was gonna release this because I had no Idea he was a rapper. The Song isn’t half bad but I just cant get into it knowing that this guy played in 15 games last year and racked up a grand total of 300 yards receiving FOR THE ENTIRE SEASON!!!

And now he wants to drop his latest hip hop song why Cowboy fans are still trying to gather themselves. Word of advice to future NFL Rappers, Don’t drop a song while the NFL season is still going on and your team is sitting at home. You end up just looking like an asshole who had 300 yards receiving for the whole year. Maybe get some extra reps in this off-season playa.

I’m also kinda surprised Cole is a rapper considering how soft he can be on Twitter after a bad game.

 

I was trying to dig up some more tweets about him being Salty but just seeing this guy makes me sick and apparently he has an album coming out this Spring. I’ll update you guys as soon as he gets cut.

Last thing, I was thinking instead of the song being called ’80 Stings’ he should change it to ’30 Catches’ -Huh, Am I right? Got Em.

Cole Beasley

Bear Dominates Man On Japanese Game Show

I thought this was gonna be a close match. Bob Sapp is a very large man who could crush most things on Earth and this battle honestly wasn’t even close. Didn’t even really look like the Bear was trying.

What Iam more impressed with is these Japanese game show producers. They are so damn creative. How are American TV networks not stealing the shit out of these people. I mean Japanese game shows have become so popular because you honestly think you’re about to see someone die. They are compelling, hilarious and terrifying all at the same time. Come on America, We gotta start thinking outside the box or just start ripping these shows off. I’m so tired of American Ninja fighter, Amazing Race, Big Brother etc. I need some new blood dammit.

2018 CFB National Championship Game Blog

Hope you guys enjoyed the 2018 CFB Nattty, I’m currently watching it while this punk ass Freshman QB from Georgia who in all honesty sounds like a great kid is driving late in the first half up 6-0. I have half my rent on Alabama -3.5 so whatever. Luckily I just moved into my new place so I don’t have to pay rent for a while. No matter what new bill I get, I always like to start out with late payments just so I can set the tone, Ya know, Like, I”m in charge or whatever.

While watching the game though, I realized that I really need to figure it out with my living room situation. I cant have people coming over when my Direc tv box is sitting on Tupperware. Let’s do a quick breakdown of where the major issues are.

derek ent center 2

  1. I have a computer monitor setup so that when I’m playing Call Of Duty I can still plug my Direc into my computer monitor and keep a close eye on all the bets I’m losing while still enjoying a Double XP Weekend.
  2. Instead of some kind of nice table sitting here with family pictures and fast food I have some Tupperware that was laying around after I unpacked.
  3. That’s the HDMI cord that I use to plug the Direc into the monitor with when I’m playing COD because COD always gets the bigger TV. I could have left this number off but I edited the picture before I wrote the blog so I had to address it.
  4. This is where I went wrong. I bought one of these stupid floating mounts but I had to mount it on a stud. No stud in the middle but I thought it wouldn’t look that bad, Boy was i wrong.
  5. Giant wire mess that makes me want to move out.
  6.  TV tray.

Now I know what you’re thinking, This guy smokes too much weed and you may be right about that but don’t worry. I’m planning on taking a trip to Ikea in a couple months and this issue will get resolved. I just wanted to do like a home makeover before and after blog. So this is the before. Now you’re gonna be checking back all the time waiting for the after. Great tease Derek.

To be continued…….

The Real “BBB” Gives The Other “BBB” An F Rating

Not a good look if you’re a Big Baller. Everybody knows that Big Ballers need Good Credit. I honestly have no idea if the Better Business Bureau has anything to do with your credit but I thought it was funny and don’t feel like looking it up. Regardless this cant be good for your company. TMZ has a bunch of the complaints if you want to read them click here.

I’m actually super pissed off about this because I was just having a conversation the other night with my uncle why we were murking everything that moved on Call of Duty ( It was double xp weekend, No big deal) and he was shitting all over Lavar Ball and the Big Baller Brand. I of course had Lavar’s back, You might notice that a lot of people who grew up without a dad will go to great lengths in defending Lavar Ball for obvious reasons. I’ll save that for another “Growing up without a Dad” blog down the road. Back to my point, I was arguing that BBB was becoming a household name, A legitimate brand, One that may rival Nike or Adidas one day. What a freaking idiot I’am but in my defense I graduated from Alternative school with a 1.8 GPA and have never even sniffed a business class – Unbelievable right? I know.

Keep your chin up Lavar and just remember, You might be a dead beat business owner but you’re definitely not a dead beat dad. Kudos.

lavar ball