Watch Nard On Twitch Tonight at 6pm Central

The Billy Madison Show is now on Twitch! Watch Nard play Call Of Duty tonight Live on Twitch at 6:00pm Central. He did a test run last night and got up to 32 live viewers at one point, His wife bitched at him and his son was embarrassed of him. It was a solid test stream. Check it out tonight!!!  www.twitch.tv/billymadisonshow 

https://player.twitch.tv/?channel=billymadisonshowWatch live video from billymadisonshow on www.twitch.tv

@BMS_Derek

Dez Caught it. Who Gives A Shit.

My phone went bonkers just after noon with the same link, Over and over and over. Like it’s your birthday on Facebook bonkers. Everybody was talking about the article that SI.com posted. Apparently the NFL Competition committee has decided that Dez caught it, Along with Jesse James from the Steelers, Calvin Johnson from the Lions Etc.

I couldn’t care less. Honestly. That was so long ago, Who cares that we had already dominated Seattle earlier that year in Seattle. The Seahawks of course would have been The Cowboys opponent in the NFC Championship Game. Who cares that Tony was playing his best football, 69% completion rate to go along with 3,700 yards and 34 TDS.  Who cares that The Cowboys run game led by that amazing offensive line and Pro Bowler Demarco Murray who carried the ball for 1,800 yards with 4.7 ypa and 13 TDS. Who cares that Dez had 16 TDS. It doesn’t matter. The decision to reverse the call was heart breaking when it happened and I still carry that loss with me everyday. Mostly because I still have a “Cowboys World Champs 2015” tattoo on my right lunch lady arm.

dez 2

Even if The Cowboys would have beat Seattle (They definitely would have) they still would have had to play Tom Brady in The Super Bowl. I would have loved to have seen that game because I think they would have played well against them. Cowboys offense was a force that year.

Dez 1

I also can’t ignore the fact that although The Cowboys would have taken the lead with a Dez TD. Aaron Rodgers and The Packers still would have gotten the ball back with 4:30 minutes left and Rodgers has had the Cowboys number. It would have been a fun finish but shoulda coulda woulda.

Dallas-Cowboys-SB-tattoo-final

So thanks for nothing Competition Committee and thank you to everyone who sent me this article. I really enjoyed it.

@BMS_Derek

Breaking News: Kevin Smith Almost Died

I’m breaking this story at 3am central standard time and according to my sources (Kevin Smith’s Twitter) I can confirm that Kevin Smith had a massive heart attack at a comedy show he was performing at. Had 100% blockage in one artery but luckily made it to the hospital in time and from what my sources are saying, He is in stable condition. Luckily for you guys, My 50mg adderall is in full effect cause I have to be one of the only people talking about this story right now because no one else in the world is awake. Feels good to break news. Feels damn good.

@BMS_Derek

Thank Zombies, Carl Is Dead.

Let me start by saying that I don’t follow this loser. So don’t even start with your commenting shit but regardless, This tweet showed up on my timeline and I couldn’t have been happier to read it.

1. I had completely forgotten this show was still airing. Like lets wrap this shit up already, This isn’t the Simpsons. 2. Great move by Carl to tweet this shit knowing millions of viewers that have checked completely out of this show will now tune back in just to see him die. Big brain under that big hat.

rick buries carl

To catch you up, Carl got bit by a zombie right during the mid season finale and only complete losers still get bit by a zombie at this point in the show and sure enough Season 8 – Episode 8 –  Carl gets bit. Then on Season 8 – Episode 9 – Carl dies. I loved it. I really think the only reason I hated Carl so much was because of that ridiculous hat he wore the entire time. Like relax pal. You ain’t the sheriff of shit, Even in the apocalypse.

rick and carl

And I admit that at times I will wear something ridiculous, Everybody does but at least we have the sense not to do that type of shit for 8 SEASONS but I admit it was definitely just the hat that bothered me, Along with his fucking cotton eye and also because he refused to be a fucking savage like his alleged father.

rick-and-carl1

Talk about wasting a badass alleged father on that loser. It just pisses me off because ya know, My dad and I don’t talk. Ever. But I swear to gawd that if my dad was a bad mf and he raised me, I would have killed way more zombies/people than him because that’s what Son’s raised by badass dads are supposed to do. Not Carl. He just wanted to wear a goofy hat and put peaches in mason jars all fucking day. Give me a break dude, You blew it.

RIP Carl

@BMS_Derek

Sushi Cake Might Be The Most Disgusting Thing I’ve Ever Seen

What in the actual fuck? First time I’ve ever been scrolling through twitter and a cake has made me want to vomit. Who would eat this? Honestly. I don’t give a shit if you even like sushi, Zero chance you anybody finds this appetizing. 0.00000000000000 chance.

@BMS_Derek

Spurs PG Dejounte Murray’s Girl Is A 10

Damn.

Dejounte murray 1

Damn.

Dejounte Murray 2

Damn.

dejounte murray 3

Damn.

dejounte murray 4

I wouldn’t mind being Dejounte Murray’s palm. Lots of benefits to being that guys palm, Minus the masturbation but you gotta take the good with the bad if you’re gonna be someone’s palm.

By the way, The nice young lady’s name is Jilly Anais (I believe it’s pronounced Anus) and she is an Instagram model.

@BMS_Derek